I’m a landscape designer, happily married for eight years. My husband is a really good man, and I’m not a possessive or jealous woman, believe me. But: He can become aroused only if he’s thinking of another woman and is able to orgasm only if he shouts out her name loudly.
I have repeatedly told him that I don’t like it, but it makes no difference. Worse, the women he fantasizes about are sometimes people I know well. I’m totally into sexual experimentation, but this is ridiculous! Please help. —Sick of It!
Shouting out other women’s names during sex? What a jerk move! To be honest though, men like to fantasize about different types of women. Hell, so do women for that matter. However, it is sooooo disrespectful to you and the marriage for him to shout out another woman’s name during sex. You’ve said you’ve repeatedly told him to stop doing this, but he keeps doing it. Oh no, honey. Teach him a valuable lesson. Next time during sex you shout out another man’s name. Not his best friend, of course, but someone he is acquainted with. I promise you, he’ll stop shouting other women’s names immediately. Or you can just tell him to “shut up or else….” You can fill in the blank or let the threat just hang in the air. The latter is more fun.
Another option is to be super mature and have a serious conversation with him. You tell him how it makes you feel when he shouts out other women’s names while the two of you are being very intimate. If he still wants to shout out names after this, then it may be time for couples counseling.
Good luck to you.
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